I know: I’ll write something fairly long. Not just pretty long, but really quite long – long enough at least that a few gems can be buried safely in the no-man’s land in the middle, where only the die-hards will find them – yes, long enough that maybe even those self-same die-hards will be too beleaguered at that middling point to take any note to speak of. Of the gems. So. I’ll need a nice slow spiral-in of rhyme-y poetry fit to tire and mire even the most dedicated. Then, a couple paragraphs disguised as prose, in which to stash my gems. And, finally, a gradual grading of more good old rhymes sliding slippery-ly outward again to the finish. Aye…
Not-knowing is nothing; I’m well-used to not-knowing
Why or which-way, even, a given breeze may be blowing
For I’m not one to keep abreast of any given recent event
And my ignorance extends well beyond the current moment
Billowing in great blank clouds back into history
To shroud peaceful progress and war-time victory
Alike all in mystery, all in unknown unknowns
Until the very fabric of the human tapestry groans,
“How can you be so little aware of me?”
Still, I’ll not strain my eyes to see
Any but a few of the whats, wheres and whos
Which mill-grind like grist in each night’s news
And nor will I memorize many names and dates
From graves, from tomes, from the commemorative plates
Mounted in rows along the walls of these catacombs I wander
No! And neither will I pause to ponder
Whether each passage I’ve before passed
But will limp along in worn circles until I come at last
To a way out, or is it to be further in
As begins,
Perhaps, another form or forum in which the so-called facts may make their attempts to manifest and to assert some authority over the whole what-has-gone-before of things… Yet I resist! So snug in the proverbial sand is my whole head fixed, it picks up nearly none of the who-said-what and when and wherefore. I’ll never know why we’re still at war! I won’t comprehend the old men’s maneuverings with their money. It’s all beyond me.
Why, even my personal history I don’t deign to know, why to any place I’ve been I did go, what there I did or even now here do, and again, again, for everloving pete’s sake, why; almost all manages to elude me when I even try to recall. Oh, once and for all, I am! There’s a fact. Needs one more? Is it not enough to have one’s own witness bore? I know I am; it’s nigh all I can keep in this noggin of mine that’s so like a sieve of holes through which all else flows
Down and away, leaving nary a trace
Save the lines growing on my aging face
Which yet retains a certain boyishness
As if the not-knowing may be that bliss
Imbibed by finders of the youth fountain
Unlike bone-dry miners of truth’s mountain
Yea – another dram of not-knowing for your
Humble, numb, nimble, nothing-knower
And, if you please, a lull-a-bye festooned
With breaking boughs, cows hurtling the moon
And other bits of pretty stuff and nonsense
To chock my in-other-wise vacant present tense
Full of words which don’t bother to mean
Anything beyond their shimmery sheen
As I’m sent into the sort of slumber
Familiar only to we who can number
The things we know with just the toes
Of one foot, while those
We don’t know
Necessarily go
Uncounted
I used to watch the news religiously. Til it became too damn toxic. Now, I cast my little vote and do what good I can in my little corner of the world. I might take a peek now and then at the news on SNL or NPR; I might write a letter, and some day, I might get back on a band wagon. But today, I have enough to do in my little corner. Thanks for affirming my self care. I think you’ve inspired my next blog post. 🙂
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Hey, this is a great write, Uttley. I like it a lot. Not just a lot, but a lot a lot. 🙂
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Thanks! It was pretty off-the-cuff compared with usual levels of in-line revision and editing, since it’s a SoCS… Hey great interview w/ Tony!
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Thanks! It was a fun interview. He asks good questions. The SoCS is a nice break from all the thought & editing. Glad I found it on your blog. 🙂
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Heard of Morning Pages via Julia Cameron? If you like SOC writing, you love doing them. Three handwritten pages every single morning. 😀
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This was a fascinating read, Uttley.. a snapshot inside your mind, dare I say? You do stream of conscious well 😀
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