SoCS :: In/Out


[click the image to go to the challenge]

The Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt this week is ‘in/out’… Thanks, Linda, for the challenge!

Here goes:

  • I live in IN (Indiana), which I recently learned is way down on the list of states addressing the mental health needs of its citizens. adult-ranking-1According to the Mental Floss article I from which I lifted this list, “The rankings were determined according to 15 measures of publicly available data on the number of adults and young people with mental illness or addiction issues in each state, as well as the rates of treatment, insurance coverage, medical costs, and the availability of mental health providers.” I guess Mental Floss was cribbing a Huff Post article.
  • Nobody at work knows about my illness. As far as my bosses and coworkers know, I’ve got as clean of a bill of mental health as can reasonably be expected. Being IN the closet at work, it feels real good I must say to be OUT about it online.
  • In the mental health support chat room where I am a moderator, I’m part of the IN crowd because of my diagnosis.
  • A few weeks ago, I ran OUT of my medication and couldn’t afford to buy more, so here for a while I have been experiencing heavy symptoms again, which has been rough. Imagine having someone looking over your shoulder and constantly criticizing everything you do; imagine they’re telepathic, too, and disparaging every thought you think. Nobody’s idea of a good time, right?
  • Yesterday I went to see the doctor, and the doctor was IN, so I managed to get sample meds for free. Can’t wait for them to kick IN. Within a few days, I should be getting some profound relief. I’ve heard Sz called mental torture. I think that’s a fitting description. In Belgium I believe, you can even be legally euthanized if you have Sz!
  • I think I have run OUT of things to say abOUT mental illness for the moment, which is kind of a relief, since I’ve written a lot about it in the last few days. I’ve been on a stigma-busting, demystifying kick ever since I read the US Surgeon General’s recent article about how important that is right now. Which is well and good but… I’m repeating myself a good deal at this point, saying the same thing to different people, and… overload! If you are one of the few who are paying close enough attention to my posts to have noticed me rehashing, I’d like to extend earnest apologies.
  • In other news, LiveJournal is as OUT as WordPress is IN. Nothing going on over there. Oh well; “OUT with the old and IN with the new,” as the old saying goes.
  • Lastly but not leastly, my favorite Led Zeppelin song – “Fool in the Rain” – happens to be on the album “IN Through The OUT Door”.


  1. Interesting that Nevada is #51. I wonder if that’s related to the Las Vegas motto about keeping secrets. Of course not telling people at work is probably a good idea in most cases since it’s none of their business. But I’m glad you have good support outside of work.


    • What’s crazy in Vegas stays… crazy. Ha. Actually, of course, crazy is one of those words – generally to be avoided with regards to real mental illness. But I could not resist.


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